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Well, Hello There World.

ahabGreetings world! Ordinarily I’d be reading about the current events around the world and plucking out one or two that strike me as interesting or amusing – but my internets are taking a MASSIVE shit all over my efforts to be productive. So, here we go, my first entry in what I understand is known by today’s whippersnappers as a ‘blob.’

As a new blobber, I’d just like to say, that’s a ridiculous word for an online journal. Anyways – I’m not really sure WHAT to say about myself. I’m male, somewhere between 20 and 65, of mostly European and native American with a dash of Canadian somewhere in there. I was sired by a psychopath and a bible-thumper. This un-holy blending has helped to color my perception of the world, as well as to pollute my image of humanity as a whole. This is perhaps why I enjoy watching humans destroy each other… Alas, I digress.

I work, for the time being, as an entry level grunt in an international hardware / home supply store. I enjoy my work, as it keeps my mind active and exposes me to some of the most abnormal humans I have ever met. This is true of anyone who works in retail, but only those of a critical and analytical mind can truly appreciate this – working in this field has shown me that humans are… fucking idiots. The whole lot of ‘em. Not you, of course, let me explain. When the everyday person is sitting around their house, or at work, or hanging out with friends, they’re typically pretty alert and cognitive. They can form whole sentences, ideas… they get that the world is a place full of other people and that those people are independent individuals who live their own lives. This somehow changes when the average person makes the transition from citizen to customer. Customers are among the most depressing, hilarious, infuriating and bewildering creatures on the planet. More on this later, I’ve once again steered myself way off the trail.

Where was I… idiots… grunt work… Oh, me. Me sucks, that’s about the gist of it. I’m alive, life is a baffling array of ‘fuck you’ and ‘fuck me’, and the hardest part of my day is figuring out who to fuck and let fuck me back. So far, it’s customers and employers, in that order. Basically, capitalism. It sure as hell ain’t perfect, but it’s a far sight better than the alternatives. So, my favorite color is light black, blue, red, or that weird yellow-brown certain folks have in their eyes. I like swimming, hikin, pina coladas, and walks in the rain. I am not overly fond of beaches. I dislike the smell of the pier. I enjoy a good book. I am quite fond of Team Four Star and their parody / retelling of something called “Dragon Ball Z”, I have no idea what it’s supposed to be, but their version is adorable. Also, their Hellsing Abridged is quite cute, definitely worth a look. If you can’t make it through episodes one and two, just skip to three – I’m sure you’ll go back and watch the two prior. OH! I almost forgot, I like motorcycles. They’re fascinating, but unfortunately ‘Merica’s drivers are fucktards and don’t know how to spot a biker before it’s too late. Until next time, peace off. ‘Merica.

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